It is just so hard to understand why people misbehave! I started advanced study in the field of psychology in 1973, and yet, when I see people being mean and destructive, I am about as baffled as this 4th grader in Shenzhen, China.
Jinyun, 4th grade, Shenzhen
That day, after school, Sun came to me, and he hit me. Normally, I wouldn't get angry. After all this is his character When you hit him back, he wouldn't hit you back. When you hit him again, he would hit you back hard at once. He would even think he was right, and said, “I didn't hit as hard as you did.” As last, he would still beat you up, So I chose not to hit him back at all. Even so he still hit me, I just couldn't put it up anymore- He has invented a game. The rule was that there were two teams. The team that pushed the other one out off the line, which both team had agreed with, won. This was a violent game, because the rule only said pushed one out off the line. Therefore, as long as he could push others out of the line, he could even beat the other one. It was obvious he invented this game to beat people up! I think: people are not born to beat by you, Why do you always beat other people? Therefore, I hit him back once. Eventually, as I had mentioned before, I was beaten by him. Bottled up all the anger and resentment, you cannot revenge, Because if you want to vent you anger on him, you will be beaten by him. Teacher has scolded him several times because he always beat other up. I just think it was strange. We are all human beings why he has such a bad temper, and has such an aggressive character? Maybe he is spoiled at home. In society, a person like him is doomed to be useless.
Jinyun begins his story with a report of a violent act by Sun and with a very interesting claim that the aggression, because it is so characteristic of Sun, does not normally provoke anger. You don’t get mad at a cat for acting like a cat. Sun’s behavior has been so erratic and aggressive that Jinyun attributes it to Sun’s character, and therefore, the author tells us, he “chose not to hit him back at all.” Alas, this strategy did not work, however, and Jinyun got beat up anyway.
Jinyun makes his case, with supportive evidence, that Sun’s aggression is characterological. He uses his narrative to report his own puzzlement and his speculations about why Sun is like this. Jinyun elevates his question to be about the human condition, “We are all human beings.” We see that Jinyun believes that people are born for a reason and being beaten by Sun is not their ‘raison d’etre’. “Why do you always beat other people?” Jinyun asks. This young author is genuinely puzzled about the source of Sun’s aggression: “I just think it was strange. He speculates that Sun’s aggressive character my be a result of a family that has spoiled him. This narrative was written during the years of the ‘one-child’ policy in China, where many children were showered with the undivided attentions of two parents and four grandparents, and there was much speculation about how this might be problematic for character development.
Jinyun ends his narrative with a declaration that I have adopted – I now quote this author when I am myself baffled by the bad behavior of other humans, “In society, a person like him is doomed to be useless.” And what worse fate for a human than to be doomed to uselessness?
Good luck with your sessions. I’m sure the discussion will be interesting and, likely, vigorous.